Our Medical School Journey, Part I

I haven’t written much about medical school on our blog. Perhaps that’s because it is a hot topic, especially being new in a place where not everyone goes to medical school. Brendon & I talk a lot about medical school with each other and I like that. I like hearing everything about Brendon's day; I like the stories, I like hearing about how he communicates with his doctor, I like knowing what he feels confident about doing, I like knowing his insecurities, I like hearing about every detail about Brendon's day. But sometimes when we are around everyone else (family, friends, neighbors), it get to be too much. Probably because it's a lot of the same stuff I've heard over & over & over...so sometimes I quit listening.

Ever since I've known Brendon, I've known the path for him was medical school. In fact, one day while leaving the HBLL (Harold B. Lee Library) on BYU campus, I ran into Brendon. We started talking, exchanged the "what's your major" conversation & ended up talking for about 20 minutes. That is when I discovered Brendon's dream of becoming a doctor. (That’s also when I first thought, “He should really ask me on a date.” Not because he wanted to become a doctor, but because he was so easy to talk to.)

I never pictured myself marrying a doctor, but was happy to know Brendon had in mind what he wanted to do with his career (a high priority on my “list”). While dating, I went to a class of his that was for prospective medical students. The class I attended was open to all spouses & significant others with two women talking about their experiences as a wife supporting their husbands through medical school. In fact, I still have those notes:

•  Independence: Do what you can do on your own; find things you enjoy doing for yourself (& possibly on your own)
• Attitude: Enjoy every minute
• Expectations: Don’t expect a date every weekend [I lucked out on this one]; understand each other’s expectations
• Motivation: Understand his motivations
• Support: Support each other
• Never Second: Find ways to show each other they are never second in your life
• Enjoyment: Enjoy whatever field you/spouse enter; make sure children understand dad enjoys his job
• Balance/Prioritize: Family comes first. Balance is not equal time to each area of life; rather, it is making sure good times outweigh the bad time.
• Humor: Find ways to laugh; Crisis + Time = Humor
• Fulfillment: Life never gets perfect, not even at 40. Enjoy every day.

The women (Sister Samuelson & her relative) talked about how much they grew as individuals & as a family & how they developed lifelong friendships with others.

And so I felt like I had an idea of what medical school would be like. I also think somehow I tricked Brendon into thinking I was a little more independent than I really am, because he knew he needed that to get through medical school, yet he still proposed to me & we got married.

Within a week of getting married, Brendon was on a plane to medical school interviews. I thought it was a little crazy that my husband of such a short time would be leaving me, but knew we had to do it. He was accepted & we chose to attend A.T. Still University - Kirksville College of Osteopathic Medicine. We were excited for a new adventure -- one that we would experience together. I was glad that we would be living in Missouri for only two short years (...little did I know how much I would come to love & miss that place).

We had one year together before medical school started. I worked while Brendon finished his undergrad. We spent eons of time together: every week night we ate dinner & hung out, every Friday and Saturday night were date nights, every Saturday day was spent cleaning together & hiking or doing something together, & then we spent all day Sunday together. After Brendon graduated, we worked together at Overstock.com, which meant we had our 40-60 minute commute (80-120 minutes if you count both ways) together and we ate lunch together. Every. Single. Day. It was wonderful. I knew spending this much time wouldn’t happen again for a very, very, very long time (as in retirement long time).