Our Medical School Journey, Part II

After almost a year of spending so much time together, we started our first year of medical school. (I always say “we” with reference to medical school, e.g. “we’re in our ‘x’ year of medical school,” but I realize it’s really Brendon going to school & doing the school work.) Our first year was challenging. The beginning required a lot of communication & getting used to. I went from a husband who cooked often, cleaned the house regularly, did the dishes almost every night, & assumed half the responsibility of Saturday chores to a husband who needed to focus on school in place of all those activities. Don’t get me wrong, he still helped around the house, just not as much as I had gotten used to.

I missed spending almost every week night & especially all day Saturday together. My favorite time of day was between 6:00 & 8:00 pm. That's when Brendon came home, we'd eat dinner, spend an hour talking, and then he was off to study. Some nights we played volleyball or went to the gym; other nights we only had time for dinner together, but we almost always had some time together. I always looked forward to Friday, our night to be together for the entire night. We tried to do something fun & relaxing. As far as Saturday’s were concerned, they were a full day for Brendon to study (poor guy). Fortunately, Brendon craves volleyball enough that he started open play in the TCC gym & so if when I really wanted time with Brendon on Saturday in the middle of the day, volleyball was my way of getting it. We really enjoyed that time together & with friends.

Outside of my relationship with Brendon, I really appreciated having good neighbors & friends to talk to often. It was reassuring that there were many others experiencing similar thoughts & feelings with a new lifestyle. We laughed, we comforted, we shared, we talked, we complained, we planned our futures, we vented, we watched movies, we ate, we played games, we learned from each other, we relied on each other, & we wouldn’t have made it as happily as we did without each other. We developed many good friendships our first year that only grew stronger as time went on.

I also really appreciated the good man I married. He was quick to help whenever I asked, he always kept his priorities straight, & he was always willing to talk whenever I needed him. He worked harder than he ever knew possible & performed really well his first year.

The greatest lesson I learned the first year was to really appreciate the time we were able to spend together. I learned that I needed to find things to do on my own--without Brendon--to be happy. I learned that even though we spent less time together, we needed each other more than ever before. I learned that when life gets busy, the most important thing is to prioritize the most important things.

The second year of medical school, looking back, seemed like a breeze. Maybe it was simply less adjusting. Maybe I was busier with work. Maybe I was busier with SAA. Maybe I was busy preparing for the baby. But whatever it was, it seemed easier…at least for me. Brendon would probably tell you otherwise. School was just as demanding, if not more so. On top of school, he had to prepare for board exams. And on top of that, we had a baby.

I don’t have much to say about the second year, other than it got better. “It” being my ability to handle my alone time when Brendon was studying for school. Life seemed a little easier. Busier, but easier. Maybe that’s why it was easier, because I was busier.